Engagement Party Gifts

Are Gifts Necessary?

One thing that both newly engaged couples and their party guests first have to realize is that engagement gifts are not required. After all, the couple will be receiving shower gifts and wedding gifts in the not-so-distant future, and an engagement party is more of an opportunity to simply celebrate the new engagement. That said, many family members and friends still choose to give engagement party gifts as a token of affection, congratulations, or good luck, but the couple or the party host should not encourage or demand gifts. Gift registries are not appropriate for an engagement party, and most couples will not yet have a wedding registry when they attend an engagement party.

Is a Party Necessary?

The engagement party itself is not even strictly necessary, though it can be a fun way to make an engagement announcement or to share the news with a wide circle of acquaintances. Alternative engagement party ideas include a barbeque, dinner, holiday party, or other event where the couple can make their announcement, or the couple’s friends and family members can celebrate with them at a movie, family fun center, or other unique location instead of organizing an exclusive party.

Ideas for Engagement Party Gifts

While neither the party nor the gifts are required, gifts can be a nice way to acknowledge a couple’s new relationship. Engagement gifts should be useful for both the bride- and groom-to-be, either for their personal use or for their wedding planning. Gift ideas include:

Gift certificates are very useful.

• Gift certificates for dinners, movies, sports events, or other activities they can share as a couple
• Wedding planning books, magazines, or calendars
• A bottle of wine or champagne to toast with at their wedding
• Novelty bride and groom items such as hats, t-shirts, or “taken” items
• Wedding planning survival guides
• Heirloom items such as the “something old” for the wedding ceremony or an heirloom engagement ring for the couple to use

Couples may also wish to give engagement party gifts to the other special people in their lives who attend the party. Doing so acknowledges the support and love they will share with the entire extended family as they begin their life together. Ideas for these couple given gifts include:

• Save-the-date magnets, cards, or other reminders about the upcoming wedding
• Novelty bridal party shirts or hats as friends and family members are asked to participate
• Parent-child jewelry to share with parents or grandparents

Regardless of what gifts are exchanged, the key to a meaningful gift is that it expresses the special feelings between the giver and the recipient. An engagement, after all, is an emotional time for everyone involved, not just the soon-to-be-wed couple.

How to Give Gifts

How gifts are presented is just as crucial as what gifts are chosen. If no gifts are expected, it may be best to present them in private to avoid embarrassment as other party goers feel guilty or put out for not having brought gifts. Very personal gifts – such as offering an heirloom ring to the couple – may also be better presented in private in case the couple is not interested or if the gift is part of a private relationship. If couples will be giving gifts to their future bridal party members, it is best to ask for their participation beforehand in case they may be forced to decline and cannot accept the gift.

To keep gifts from becoming the center of attention at an engagement party, a gift table can be designated and all gifts deposited there. Some parties, however, include gift opening as a traditional activity, and the couple should do so graciously and be sure to thank everyone who gave them a gift.

Gifts to Avoid

Some gifts are inappropriate regardless of the circumstances and giving them would show a serious lack of engagement party etiquette. An engagement party is meant to celebrate the couple, and any gift exclusively for either the bride or groom is best left for the bridal shower or bachelor party. Similarly, gifts that poke fun at marriage foibles in demeaning or harsh terms should be avoided at this type of optimistic celebration, as well as any gifts hinting far beyond the wedding ceremony – starting a family, for example. Conservative guests may be offended by gag gifts, and any gift in poor taste should also be left out of the festivities.

Engagement party gifts are a great way to celebrate a couple’s new status or for the couple to acknowledge the love and support of their family and friends. Appropriate gifts will be remembered long past the I do’s and will help the couple start their nuptial planning in a bright and happy atmosphere.